The Heartbreak of Losing a Crew
by medchan
Summary: A tragic look at the possible aftermath of Sanji's decision in Chapters 843, 844, and 845. Heavy Spoilers. Character Death.
1. Sanji

Based on One Piece Chapters 843, 844, and 845.

This will be a tragedy. You have been warned. Also, Character Death. Again, warnings now.

* * *

It was almost like the ending to the duel in Water 7 all over again, Sanji mused. He'd apologized, more than a few tears were shed that neither he nor Luffy were about to acknowledge any time soon, and he'd been brought back into the crew, the same as Usopp, the same as Robin. Everything should be good between them now, and yet, something sat uneasy in the pit of his stomach. Somehow, things didn't seem right. Was he just imagining it? Something was off but he couldn't place his finger on it.

She'd been cute enough, his supposed bride. At first, it had been seriously tempting, for just a second, to imagine being married to her. He'd never have thrown away his pride as a pirate, his connection to his captain and his crew, for some pretty girl, however. No matter who she was, it went beyond just finding the All Blue. It was more than just cooking for them, being apart of their family. He needed to be there for all of them but especially for Luffy. However, not even Luffy could compare to that threat against the only man he considered like a father, Chef Zeff. Losing his hands, losing his place in the crew, losing his father, all the loses had added up so quickly that he'd quickly spiraled into hopelessness. A spiral down equal to his eyebrows, Usopp had joked when they were reunited, which got him a very light kicking. He hadn't seemed to appreciate Sanji's 'welcome back' kicks to the face, which Sanji was alright with, since he hadn't fully appreciated that comment about his eyebrows.

He half expected, half hoped that reuniting and the resulting fight in Wano would help set the right tone for them again. Yet stubbornly, things continued to seem off. Everyone functioned in their expected place in the crew but there was this soft, underlying tension he couldn't shake. It was as though someone had held up a grenade, pulled the pin, thrown it, only for it to be revealed that it was a dud. The tension, the expectation of everything to go to hell, wouldn't fade with time, though. Wherever it was coming from, and maybe he was just projecting it himself, that person refused to let the expectation of things going to hell die.

Why the hell did it still matter, though? It should have been a clean slate after forgiveness was granted. He frowned, cigarette smoke lightly swirling away with the wind, and stared out into the vast ocean. Behind him, laughter and jokes abound as Luffy entertained the latest additions to their crew. Jimbe had finally joined them, had even helped bring him back to the crew, and with him came his own crew, a merry band of fishmen pirates. They wouldn't always be staying with the Strawhats; they had their own adventures to fulfill, but for the meantime, it was a party.

Usopp came over, wrapping an arm around Sanji's shoulder, a tankard in hand and half drunk already. Laughing and singing, he shook the cook lightly, half coaxing, half demanding he come join in the fun. He gave a half-hearted smiled and tossed his mostly unsmoked cigarette overboard. As he finally started to relax into the festivities, he suddenly felt eyes upon him. Looking around, he noticed Law staring at him for some reason, on the edge of the festivities as usual. He ignored the feeling of dread that suddenly sat heavy in his stomach. No, it couldn't be that Law was the one projecting this heavy air, could it? He was supposed to be their ally. He didn't think that Luffy would handle being betrayed in their alliance very well. With only the thought in mind that he should protect his captain if that might be the case, he made his way over to Law.

Before he could open his mouth to say anything, the other pirate captain beat him to it. Law spoke quietly, only one warning. _"You shouldn't over-estimate him."_

Sanji's blood ran cold.


	2. Nami

Based on One Piece Chapters 843, 844, and 845.

This will be a tragedy. You have been warned. Also, Character Death. Again, warnings now.

* * *

It should be easy to forgive him and move on, Nami knew that. After everything Luffy went through to get Sanji back in the crew, she instinctively knew that there really was no one else that could be their cook. No one else could come in and take his place. No one else would be as accepted by the crew and Luffy as Sanji was when he cooked for them. And for the most part, it _was_ easily done. She smiled as she watched him take joy in cooking again. She enjoyed watching his relationship with Usopp progress, as the two got closer as friends. This was his home, this was his family, that much was obvious. Yet she couldn't quite put out of her mind that awful moment when she'd thought he betrayed them. Watching him fight Luffy; worse, watching him _beat up Luffy_ while her captain refused to fight back, after he'd long reached his limit… She hadn't felt that helpless in a long time, sitting on the side lines, unable to do anything to help either of the important men her life. She'd hated that feeling and she resented that it was her crewmate, her nakama, that it was _Sanji_ would had given it to her.

She just couldn't quite let the feeling go. It should have been the same, accepting Sanji back into the crew. He had no more betrayed them than Robin or Usopp. He'd been fighting to protect everything important to him, sacrificing himself in the progress, the same way Robin had. He'd declared war on Luffy the same way Usopp had. Something about this time was different, however. The feeling after he came back was off. Was it because it had been so completely unexpected? His betrayal seemed so far out of left court, you wouldn't even think to look, expecting it from the right? She couldn't quite put her finger on it but something seemed wrong, off somehow, and there was an underlying tension that seemed to be growing between the crew.

When would this feeling fade away?

The party dwindled down after a couple days and Jimbe said his goodbyes to his pirate crew. They watched in silence as they sailed away. Well, mostly in silence. Usopp cheered them all on, shouting encouraging words to the brave men and women on the crew. Luffy laughed and waved, wishing them luck. It wasn't until after they were out of ear shot, as they were becoming a smaller and smaller speck on the horizon, that dread crept into her chest, leaving Nami feeling cold inside.

She watched, the whole crew did, as the smile faded from Luffy's lips and the innocent joy settled into a serious light. He didn't look at any of them, just stared out into the distance. Suddenly, she knew exactly where the underlying tension was coming from. It wasn't from her. It wasn't from Sanji.

It was from the one source she would have thought was most unlikely. Luffy turned to face all of them, to address them, and she wondered for the first time how this was effecting _him_.


	3. Luffy

Based on One Piece Chapters 843, 844, and 845.

This will be a tragedy. You have been warned. Also, Character Death. Again, warnings now.

* * *

Luffy just stared at his crew for a minute. He didn't feel any of the tension or dread that they did. He didn't realize for a second he'd been projecting it. If he had, he probably would have flashed a light-hearted smile and tried to set them all at ease. He liked his crew, a lot. They were his nakama. They were important to him; the most important.

They were all he had left in the world, after Ace died.

Them, and now Sabo. He'd regained his dream, had forged forward even after he thought it was impossible. What had kept him sane, though, when he had lost his whole world, was his nakama. That feeling, that surety that they would always be together, had been shaken when Sanji left him. He'd taken it for granted once, having someone in the world that would always stand by his side. He'd been so sure that Ace would always be there. He'd believed that promise made when they were kids, that he would never die. He didn't want to make that same mistake a second time and be blindsided.

"While we were apart, for two years, I got stronger. Stronger and stronger and stronger. I'm stupid and an idiot so I can't really do a lot of thinking but I wanted to get stronger. I wanted to be able to protect you all. I didn't want to lose anyone ever again."

Never again. Not like Ace. No. Never.

"I'll fight for you. Each and every one of you. I may be stupid but you're my nakama. I will always come and I will always fight for you."

Please.

"If you want to leave in the future…"

Please…

"You can. I won't stop you."

Please, don't.

"I want you to be here by choice. I want to go on lots of fun adventures together because we all want to."

"Luffy, we do! We do want-" Nami tried to interrupt but Usopp patted her arm and shook his head slightly. She cut off and Luffy continued, as if she hadn't spoke. Inside, everything in him was trembling. He had a dream, a dream he would keep running toward, no matter what, but he didn't want to think of doing it alone. He didn't want to think of doing it, missing any of the people here.

"If you ever want to leave, if you ever get tired of the adventures, just tell me. I'll let you go."

 _Please, don't leave him._

Luffy turned his back on his crew, unable to look at them anymore, and stared out at the vast ocean. He'd made a mistake once, which cost him everything. He'd believed Ace would always be there, would always be by his side. He wouldn't make that mistake and assume again. This time, he wouldn't lose everything. He'd only give up a small portion of his heart, that was all…


	4. Zoro

Based on One Piece Chapters 843, 844, and 845.

This will be a tragedy. You have been warned. Also, Character Death. Again, warnings now.

* * *

For two days after that announcement, after their laughing captain suddenly turned serious on them, Luffy refused to budge from that position on deck. His stomach growled loudly but he refused to eat, wouldn't even acknowledge anyone's presence who approached him. He didn't eat, didn't sleep, just stared out at the ocean, as if he was trying to prepare himself for something. By the end of that first day, they realized he was trying to prepare himself in case someone actually _did_ want to leave. He honestly believed that one of them might take him up on his offer, that they might want to leave.

The idiot.

By the evening of the second day, Zoro's irritation had reached the limit. He needed to lash out all his frustration and worry over his captain at someone, so he chose a likely suspect. He lashed out at the man he deemed responsible for all of this, the culprit of Luffy's worry. He snapped and lashed out at Sanji. The battle wasn't like their usual ones, rivals battling to keep each other sharp, competing against each other. This battle quickly took a turn for the serious, until they were both lashing out. Zoro vocally blamed Sanji and while Sanji didn't deny it, indeed, looked suitably guilty over this, he lashed out saying Zoro hadn't done much better than him at alleviating Luffy's fears.

The two continued to battle it out, nearly destroying each other and the Sunny in the process, until finally, someone managed to step in between them.


	5. Usopp

Based on One Piece Chapters 843, 844, and 845.

This will be a tragedy. You have been warned. Also, Character Death. Again, warnings now.

* * *

Usopp had had enough of this. He was sick and tired of the name calling, the blame game, the fighting. He stepped in between Zoro and Sanji in the middle of their fight. He was no longer that weak coward who'd run in between them right before they fought Arlong. It might have taken all he had not to get crushed by the blows but he managed to fend them off. His arms were shaking from the effort but he pretended he was merely shaking with rage. It wasn't far off.

"No. **_No_**." He snapped, turning to glare at Zoro. "You don't get to judge. Not again. You don't know what it's like, to be pushed to your limit that you see no other way out but to quit the crew. _You_ don't get to judge."

He wasn't done yet, however. He whirled around, rounding on Sanji, and gave him his fiercest upper cut. It was clear the skilled fighting cook wasn't expecting it. None of them were. They all still saw him as he'd been in the past; weak, a coward. Unable to defend himself and worse, during that moment when he'd needed them most, unable to support Luffy.

"And _you_. You don't get to act like nothing's happened. You better than most of us, understood exactly what you were doing when you tried to leave. You were here to see how Robin's betrayal, how _my_ betrayal, effected Luffy. You were trying to do it as painlessly as possible for us? Cut the bullcrap, Sanji! If you were going to leave, at least be honest about it! Like I was! Of course it was going to be painful! We're your friends! _We're your nakama!_ There was no way your leaving us wouldn't effect us!"

He glared a hole into the swirl eyebrowed cook. "You know how Luffy is. When Vivi tried to do the same thing, fight so no one else got hurt besides herself, Luffy called her out on it! And you, _you_ agreed with him! How could you possibly think, two years later, that he would be okay with _you alone_ being hurt?"

Usopp was panting, his eyes blurry with an inexplicable wetness. A loud, growling stomach threatened to cut into the moment but a quick glance Luffy's way revealed he was still staring out at the sea. He was lost in his own mind, trying to find the way to let them go, to give them freedom. That was the kind of captain he was; stupid, but loyal to a fault. He would destroy himself rather than take away their freedom, their independence. He pointed at his beloved captain, tears raining down the sides of his face.

"You guys don't get to judge! We all put him here, in this position! No one here can get through to him, no one here knows how to help him! It wasn't just one person who backed him into a corner! We all did it."


	6. Law

Based on One Piece Chapters 843, 844, and 845.

This will be a tragedy. You have been warned. Also, Character Death. Again, warnings now.

* * *

Dinner was a quiet affair. None of the crew could really look at the others, all of them quietly digesting Usopp's words. Law ate his rice and watched them, trying to stay detached from the situation. He didn't want to get involved. He didn't want to feel anything towards these people. They weren't his crew; he had no obligation towards them.

"What did you mean before, when you warned me not to over-estimate him?" Sanji spoke up, cutting through the silence. Dark circled eyes met clearly challenging ones. "Was that a threat? Are you watching us all now, waiting for your chance to strike?"

Law slowly chewed his rice, swallowed and leaned over to pick up his cup. He drained down the rest of his tea before speaking. "No. I was warning that this might happen."

He had no obligation to them, yet he couldn't shake the feeling that if he'd spoken up sooner, he might have been able to prevent all this.

"What?"

Law picked up a pickled radish with his chopsticks, chewed it slowly as he listened to the breathless word. They were all staring at him in shock. Was it really that amazing that he predicted that this might happen? Did they really know so little about their captain's condition?

"How much do you know about the incident that occurred two years ago?"

Nami's eyebrows furrowed slightly. "You mean, what happened to his brother? What we read in the papers, why?"

He hadn't told them anything about it. He hadn't told them anything. Somehow, he shouldn't feel surprised by this. His heart had been so badly shaken, he probably didn't have the words to tell them. Law finished the last pickled radish and set down his chopsticks.

"Your captain almost died."

That didn't seem to phase them. They looked at each other, as if they couldn't understand why he was bringing this up.

"Because of his injuries, right? I saw how well you tended to the wound, afterward-" Their ship doctor, Chopper, tried to guess. Law minutely shook his head, cutting him off.

"It's true, I barely managed to save his life because of his injuries but that's not what I'm referring to. I'm referring to after he woke up." He saw them start, saw as the realization hit them of what he was talking about. They did know their captain, after all, at least in part. He didn't think, however, they could imagine what had happened. As much as he'd wanted to save Luffy back then, he hadn't had the heart to force him to live. All that pain, rage, hurt, regret, _need_ … He'd been prepared to walk away, to let him die- No, he'd been prepared to let him wear himself out, try to revive him again, and go through the process as many times as he needed, in hopes that the reckless rookie, like himself, might somehow gain the will to live again.

"He nearly destroyed himself after he woke up. Did a real number on my crew and then went on a rampage on the island. He wouldn't stop screaming and raging. In that state, if he'd continued like that, beating everything up with his body, he likely would have died. I don't think he would have cared, though. He was that far gone."

Law stood to his feet, picking up his sword and walking past them. "I don't know what Jimbe said to get him to stop. I imagine it was something about you, though. You should ask him about it." He stepped out into the cooling night to stand vigil. Not just on watch for any attackers but to make sure Luffy didn't accidentally fall overboard due to hunger. Jimbe was already at his post, by Luffy's side. He was the only one who hadn't said anything in regards to this situation.


	7. Jimbei

Based on One Piece Chapters 843, 844, and 845.

This will be a tragedy. You have been warned. Also, Character Death. Again, warnings now.

* * *

"Hrmm." Jimbei hummed, as he regarded the crew and Law. He didn't have anything against answering their request but he wasn't sure if it was really his place. "Hrmm."

A glance at Luffy-kun revealed him trying not to drift off. He hadn't seemed to object to anything else they were doing thus far. He probably wouldn't object to him revealing a bit of what happened, right? He looked back at the anxious faces in the fading light.

"Alright, I'll tell you a bit of what happened. Only a bit." He agreed with a heavy sigh. He didn't move from his position, seated by Luffy-kun's feet. He wanted to make sure he could grab the boy if he started falling overboard. "I was with Ace when he was in prison. I protested the war, refused to aid the Navy in their quest against Whitebeard."

He had his reasons, reasons they had a faint understanding of, but he had no intention of explaining any of that now. He was only going to tell a small portion of the story.

"I was there when Boa Hancock arrived, bringing Luffy-kun with her, though we didn't know that at the time. All I knew was that one of my supposed allies delivered Ace a message. His brother was there, was coming for him. I'd never seen him so upset as when he heard the news. He believed every word of it because he knew his brother well, much better than I did at the time."

He could see it on their faces. They all knew Luffy-kun well enough to imagine what Ace must have felt upon hearing it. "If you're asking what I told Ace, I'll only say that I repeated a message Ace told me. The reason he had hope for his little brother to survive, to be okay, even if something happened to him."

Jimbei glanced at Luffy-kun. "He said that he'd be okay because he had a good crew supporting him. When I asked him what he had left, he said he had you. All of you. If you're asking why he's still alive right now, I'd have to say it's because of you."

It was kind of heartbreaking for him, watching their crushed faces. They hadn't known. They hadn't known not just that their captain had been in _that much_ pain, in _that much_ of a hopeless place. No, they hadn't know that they, themselves, were his _hope_. They had taken for granted how much he needed them. Yes, Luffy-kun could and would go on without them, if he needed to, but it didn't mean it wouldn't take a huge toll on him. After all, he'd clung to life thinking they'd be there for him.


	8. Franky

Based on One Piece Chapters 843, 844, and 845.

This will be a tragedy. You have been warned. Also, Character Death. Again, warnings now.

* * *

A loud, growling noise echoed through the ship. Still, the crew slept on, sadly used to the sound. Luffy not eating was perhaps the most worrying thing for them but they couldn't force him to eat. Somehow, it was just hard to approach him when it was clear how set he was in his resolve. However, a voice croaked out, a little worn from disuse.

"Sanji~"

Franky rolled over, trying to place why that sounded so familiar and yet it also felt like he hadn't heard it in forever.

"San~ji~ Food. I'm hun~gry~"

Suddenly, Sanji was rolling out of bed, hitting the floor with a loud thud. He didn't care that he woke everyone else in the room, scrambling to his hands and knees, looking around wildly. Franky sat up, rubbing his eyes, before the sound processed in his head. His eyes widened. It was a voice they'd all been waiting to hear and finally, on the morning of the third day, here it was.

"San! Ji! Food! I'm hungry!" Luffy pouted, rubbing his stomach and yawning tiredly as he came to stand in the doorway. It was as if these past three days hadn't even happened for him. He was acting the same.

There was a loud sniffle and Sanji was hanging his head but Franky could see his watery smile from this angle. "Really, you're such a…" Getting to his feet on shaky legs, Sanji wiped the tears from his eyes, his smile brighter even than when he'd rejoined the crew. "Come on, then, Captain. I'll whip you up a feast, whatever you like."

Luffy paused mid-yawn and suddenly grinned, laughing. "Shi shi shi shi~ You're the best, Sanji!"

Really, it was like the last three days hadn't even happened but as his eyes teared up in relief, Franky knew they had and knew they weren't necessarily past the storm yet.

Breakfast was a noisy affair. When was any meal with Luffy not a noisy affair, really? Nami and Robin looked on as Luffy continued to eat everything in sight, both smiling fondly. Law quietly sipped his tea, acting like he had no part in this. Usopp kept grinning and tearing up, only to wipe them away and shove plate after plate of food towards Luffy. He insisted he wasn't hungry and even let the shorter male steal off his plate. Chopper was checking his pulse and trying to determine how this impromptu fasting had effected his health. He kept shouting at him to eat quietly but didn't seem overly worried, so it couldn't be _too_ bad, right? Zoro and Jimbei sat in silence while Sanji moved around, cooking at his fastest speed and putting out as much food as he possibly could. He was determined to make up for his gaffe and make sure that his captain never felt the need to go hungry again.

Luffy suddenly pauses in the middle of eat. "Ah!" He holds out a large ham with a big bite taken out of it. "Right! Sanji! Before I forget, I thought about it!"

He doesn't seem to notice the tension that immediately riles up in the air around him. Then again, his idiot captain has always been like that. Sanji pauses in cooking for a minute, his happy humming stopping and he turns down the flames of the stove top before slowly turning around. His expression is wary, even pensive. Franky wonders if he's questioning his place on the crew. Had Luffy been questioning his place on the crew? Surely not! That's what started all this! His eyes whip to Luffy, who doesn't seem to notice that almost everyone is staring at him.

"I thought really, really long and hard about this but I still couldn't find the right words." He mumbles, his voice loud in the quiet room, tapping his head thoughtfully as he closes his eyes and concentrates. He finally screws up his face in a happy smile and laughs. "Shi shi shi shi! So you're just gonna have to trust me, okay? If something's important to you, tell me! I'll protect it with all my might, no matter what! That goes for all of you, okay?"

This whole time. This whole time when they had been worrying about him, fretting about his mental health, his well being. This whole time, he was trying to find the right words. The right words to reassure them, to let them know that they would be safe as part of his crew. That he would do everything in his power to protect them, to protect what was important to them, everything was _for_ them. Franky wasn't surprised when Sanji covered his mouth with a shaking hand or when he suddenly kneeled down. It wasn't just relief when he started bawling, it was heart felt gratefulness. Nami teared up as well, laughing and crying, as was Usopp. Robin let out her usual quiet laugh and Franky was sure that he saw a small smile grace Law's lips for a minute. Zoro sighed but seemed relieved and so did Jimbei. Chopper looked around, eyes wide and a happy expression on his face, taking the whole scene in. Franky wasn't ashamed when he started bawling a minute later, shouting it was so beautiful, nor did he mind when Brook announced that he needed to play a tune to celebrate.

Luffy just laughed his usual laugh, taking the whole scene in with a confused but bright smile. "Why're you guys crying over breakfast? You guys are weird. Shi shi shi shi!"

"You big idiot," laughed Nami, still crying and laughing as she hugged him tight.

Finally. Finally, there was a semblance of normality returning to the crew. Their captain was officially back and Franky couldn't be happier.


	9. Brook

Based on One Piece Chapters 843, 844, and 845.

This will be a tragedy. You have been warned. Also, Character Death. Again, warnings now.

* * *

"Luffy-san. What do you think you'll do after you become the Pirate King?" Brook asked curiously.

It wasn't really a topic they'd ever thought about or broached before. What happens _after_ the adventure ends.

Luffy hums in amusement and doesn't even take much time to consider it. "I'm going to visit Ace's grave!" He announces cheerfully, startling them all. That name was still a taboo on this ship, for fear that saying too much might break their fragile captain while he was still getting over everything that had happened. Hearing Luffy say it was a bit shocking. He, of course, didn't notice their hesitation or concern. He just laughs and continues on with what he'll do. Of course he would have thought about what comes next, when this ends. "I'm going to tell him about all the adventures we went on, all the fun we had, and make him proud that I did it! Just like he said, I became the pirate king~" He grins and chuckles some more. "And then, I'll probably go on another adventure! I'm not sure what yet but it'll be grand, I know it!"

His eyes glow with confidence and contentment, if not fully at peace with Ace's death, at least at peace with himself. It's hard to tell what his feelings are, in regards to his brother, and with it being a taboo topic, the rest of the crew is usually too afraid to bring it up, to question it too much.

"You want to go on more adventures after you become the Pirate King?" Brook prompts. It shouldn't be so surprising, and yet, it hadn't occurred to him that he might not be done once everything was over.

Luffy laughs again. "Shi shi shi shi! Yeah! I don't know if I'll go with you guys or not, but the whole reason I want to do this is because being the Pirate King means I get to have the most freedom on the seas! Plus, I made a promise to Shanks!"

That line made them start, not sure what to make of the first part of his statement. "What do you mean, you don't know if you'll go with us or not?!" Zoro demands harshly.

Luffy blinks at him and then grins. "Well, yeah. I mean, your dream is to become the strongest swordsman in the world, right?" He laughs, turning his eyes on Nami even as his eyes crinkle in delight. "And you want to draw a map of the whole world." Sanji. "You're going to find the All Blue!" Usopp. "You're going to be a great warrior of the sea!" Chopper. "You want to be the very best doctor you can be." Franky. "You want to sail on the ship that you built!" Robin. "You want to find the world's history." Brook. "You're waiting to be reunited with Laboon."

He laughs again, arms naturally coming to rest behind his head. "Once you guys achieve your dream, just like when I become the Pirate King, it's going to be up to you if you want to continue or not, you know?"

He won't force them. They all know that. Luffy values freedom above all else. He firmly believes in everyone making their own choices. Sometimes he doesn't agree with those choices; he can be stubborn and selfish and hardheaded and try to bully them into changing their choices but he won't force them. Never would he actually force them. Sanji is a prime example of that. When they first met, he all but demanded that Sanji be the cook on his ship but after the battle, he was willing to leave without Sanji by his side. It had to be Sanji's choice; he'd been adamant about that. When the other cooks tried to force Sanji out and get Luffy to bring him along by force, he'd refused. And this last time as well, when Sanji beat him up, he refused to believe that Sanji would turn against him and stubbornly went on a hunger fast. He didn't force Sanji to come back with him, though; again, it had to be his choice. He'd been this way all along, with every crew member, at some point or another. They all knew this side of him very well.

"I, for one, would be honored to continue my adventures with you after I meet up with Laboon." Brook replied, bowing humbly.

Luffy laughs again. "Shi shi shi shi! I would love that!"

One by one, they all sign up for more adventures with Luffy. Yeah. _Yeah_. He was their captain. Their stupid, lovable, screw-loose captain and if he wanted to go on more adventures, they would all be delighted to spoil him with even more of their time and company. It wasn't so easy as to let him go completely.


	10. Chopper & Robin

I'm adding this chapter in because I feel like the crew would need a little bit of closure, after worrying about Luffy so much. Naturally, Luffy provides it without even realizing they need it.

Based on One Piece Chapters 843, 844, and 845.

This will be a tragedy. You have been warned. Also, Character Death. Again, warnings now.

* * *

Chopper stared up at Luffy with big eyes, his smile bright, looking expectant. "Luffy?" He asked at lunch, about a month and a half later.

"Hmm?" Luffy turns to look at him, mouth bulging with how overly stuffed it is, before holding out a dragon fruit to him. "Hwant soam Chopa?"

"No, no. Can I ask you something?"

"Shur." Luffy agreed with a grin, laughing even as he continued eating.

"Can you tell me more about Ace?"

It was the forbidden phrase. They hadn't thought to really ask a lot of questions about his brother after they parted ways. The Davy Back fight had led to that whole meeting with Aokiji and then Robin's betrayal. After adding Franky to their growing family, then Brook and the Thriller Bark event, it had been briefly brought up again when Lola pointed out that his life force was fading when Luffy proudly showed her his big brother's paper. Luffy himself had said they shouldn't go after Ace, though, even though Nami and the others had been ready, even tried to persuade him, to take a brief side track from their adventures. A few of them still felt guilty; they should have tried harder, done more, and maybe things would have turned out differently. And after Ace died, they just had silently agreed not to bring it up, not to push Luffy out of his comfort zone. He so very rarely showed them any weakness, they didn't want to push or hurt him more. The rest of the crew waited with bated breath as Luffy slowly chewed, looking thoughtful. "Hmmm."

He swallowed, then looked down at Chopper, grinning. "Sure! What do you want to know?"

Chopper looked excited to learn something new about Luffy. "What was he like growing up?"

"As a kid?" Luffy laughed, holding his stomach. "Shi shi shi shi! Ace hated me as a kid! We didn't get along at all!"

"Ehhhh?" Usopp leaned forward, suddenly even more invested in this conversation.

"Yup, yup! He spit in my face the first time we met and he wouldn't have anything to do with me for a very long time!" Luffy was still laughing, not seeming bothered by this conversation.

Robin smiled and closed her eyes, concentrating for a moment. Franky was outside, manning the helm, and Nami was tending her orchard. Zoro was training in the bird's nest, as well. Jimbei and Brook were just relaxing outside in the sun, having a quiet conversation about teas and the weather. It didn't seem fair to her that the rest of the crew be excluded from this conversation. Only herself, Usopp, Chopper, Sanji and Law were here. She smiles brightly at Chopper and Luffy. "Doctor Chopper, don't you think this is a conversation that would be better had outside? I think our captain could use a little fresh air, don't you?"

"Oh! Uh huh!" Chopper agreed brightly. He turned and tugged on Luffy's arm, gesturing towards the door. "You should get more fresh air!"

"Doesn't he get enough as it is already?" Usopp complained, standing up regardless and helping pick up a couple plates of food. After his last fasting session, it seemed to be the crew's new mission to make sure that Luffy always had enough to eat, whenever he wanted. It wouldn't last, couldn't, but for now they were beyond indulging of the rubber man.

"You guys go ahead. I'll join you in a minute. Just need to add some spices and then I can leave this to simmer for a couple of hours." Sanji told them absently. He, too, was incredibly curious to hear more about Ace but cooking for his captain and crew came first.

"But Chopper, Robin, my food~" Luffy complained, piling food high on a large platter and heading for the door.

"Fu fu fu fu." Robin laughed. She used her abilities to hold to door open for him before grabbing a few more plates herself. "I'll bring more if you're still hungry, captain."

"Really? Thanks, Robin, you're the best!" Luffy exclaimed, running outside. He headed straight for the grass, laying out and eating some food first. Brook came over to sit with them, sipping some tea and relaxing. Jimbei stayed by the railing, soaking up the sun and enjoying the slightly ocean spray. He could hear the conversation well enough from where he was. He felt Chopper's eyes on him and he furrowed his brow in confusion for a minute. "Oh! Wright. Ascu."

He chewed and swallowed again before sitting cross legged. He laughed, the sound naturally drawing attention from the crew. It was an endearing sound that they couldn't seem to get enough of. "Shi shi shi shi. So, yeah. Ace hated me when we first met. I can't recall how many times he tried to kill me or lose me in the woods!"

"And that's your beloved older brother?" Law drawled, clearly not impressed. Luffy turned his bright smile on him, still laughing, and the other pirate captain clucked his tongue, looking away. "Tsk. Idiot."

"Shi shi shi! Yeah, Ace called me that too~ I met him right after I last saw Shanks!" Law stiffened, not knowing the connection between the rookie and the Yonko, one of the most powerful beings in the Grand Line, but Luffy was already continuing on. As he talked, Nami came out from tending her orchard, Franky smiled while listening from the helm, and Zoro peered down, curious as to what was going on down below. He couldn't fully hear it from the bird's nest but he could see how animated Luffy was, which was always a good sign. "Gramps was real mad! He dragged me into the mountains and left me with some mountain bandits. I really didn't like them at first, cause while they weren't the same ones, mountain bandits are the ones who kidnapped me and threw me into the sea. But I couldn't fight my Gramps so I had to stay there."

"Wait, wait. Back up. Mountain bandits kidnapped you?!" Nami shrieked.

"Mmm. Yeah, when I was a kid. They were making fun of Shanks, so I got real mad and picked a fight with one of them. Shanks just got back into town and tried to stop them, but the leader kidnapped me." He recounts the entire story with no inflection of the danger.

"How old were you?!" Nami demands, her hands automatically going to her hips as she hides her concern for a young Luffy behind anger.

"Ummmm." Luffy does some quick math on his fingers before proudly displaying his answer. "I was seven!"

He laughs again before adding to his story. "Anyway, the mountain bandit ran away in a boat, carrying me along, but once he was out of the village, he didn't need me anymore. So he threw me into the ocean. I was really frustrated and scared and was sure I was going to drown and die! Shi shi shi shi! And then our local sea monster popped up and ate him. Ate him, his boat, and then looked straight at me! I tried flailing some more but an anchor is an anchor so I couldn't do anything. I was really sure I was going to die then."

His story had his crew riveted. Obviously he turned out fine, he was still alive after all, but what happened next? Luffy continued, still laughing about the whole thing, not noticing how he had them on the edges of their seats.

"That's when Shanks showed up! He grabbed me and saved me, but he lost his arm in the process. He looked at the sea monster and told it to stand down, to go away. And the amazing part is that it did!" He throws his arms wide open, with childlike glee and wonder. "Oh! He must have the King's Haki like I do! I didn't know about that back then, though. I just knew he was the coolest person in the whole wide world and he gave up his arm, just to protect me."

"So, as a child, you're saying your life was worth so much that you single handedly managed to partially cripple _forever_ one of the Four Yonko, a man considered one of _the most powerful_ in the Grand Line?" Law emphasized, trying to keep up.

Luffy laughed and grinned at him. "I have no idea what you just said but yeah, Shanks lost his arm because of me. And then, we made a promise. I would become Pirate King, build up a crew way better than his, and return his hat when I did."

Law huffed in annoyance. He managed to forge an alliance with the one rookie who had a personal connection, an entire _past_ with one of the Yonko. The same rookie who was determined to _beat_ all four Yonko. Of course he did. That was just his luck.

Luffy starts stuffing his face, looking thoughtful. "Whut were ve toaking avout agin?"

"You were telling us about how Ace hated you growing up?" Usopp replied, helping refocus his captain's story. As amazing as that story might seem to Law or some of the others, it just seemed par for the course to Usopp. After all, he's always seen what an amazing person Luffy was after meeting him.

"Oh. Right." Luffy tries to recall where he left off. "Well, after he spit in my face the first time we met, I got really mad at the time about it, too. And then, ummmm." He taps his temple thoughtfully, trying to remember back. "Well, until I actually stumbled across him and Sabo and their hidden treasure stash, he wouldn't really have anything to do with me. Then some really big guys grabbed me! They kept asking me where the treasure was- oh right! Sabo and Ace wanted to pirates when they grew up too and they were already creating a pirate treasure pile, which I accidentally found, and that made them mad! And _then_ these big guys grabbed me but despite me telling them that I had no idea where it was, for some reason they wouldn't believe me! Isn't that odd?"

He laughs, finding that mysterious. His crew, on the other hand, all collectively sigh. They've had to deal with Luffy's terrible lying skills so they can easily imagine that it was just as bad as a kid. He would have been a dead give away the minute he started trying.

"What happened after that?" Nami asked with a sigh.

"Oh." There was a pregnant pause, which even Zoro felt, as he was coming down from the bird's nest to join them. Luffy scrunched up his face, like he was remembering something unpleasant. "Well, I almost died. They took me and beat me a lot, until I couldn't even scream anymore, according to Sabo. I don't really remember, beyond that it hurt a lot. He had metal gauntlets, which were super cool! Up until they started hitting my head and face, that is." He frowns at the memory, not exactly pained by it but not able to laugh it off like most of his others, either. Suddenly, he grinned, his face lighting up in a huge smile. "Oh, but then Sabo and Ace decided to come rescue me after all! I got a huge lecture from Ace, about how stupid it was, not telling them where the treasure was, but he agreed to be my friend after that. And then, and then!"

Luffy grew ecstatic, telling them animatedly all about growing up with Sabo and Ace. Robin watched on, chuckling quietly, enjoying how happy her captain looked. Why had they avoided this subject for so long? It was clear that he adored his brother from the start, even she had heard about it after joining the crew, yet they had avoided it for fear the memories would be painful for him. Yet here he was, defying their expectations, delighting in relaying all about how awesome his brothers were. He talked about training with them, about never winning any fights with them and how they were insanely strong. He talked about the adventures they went on, sneaking into town for food or stealing stuff. He quieted, just a bit, when he talked about Sabo being taken away and his face fell when he mentioned how Sabo supposedly died. Nami clutched her hand to her mouth, holding back a gasp and a sob, eye watering. He'd been so young at the time and of course he truly would believe that Sabo had been killed by nobles who fired upon his ship. Celestial dragons, from the sound of it, but it was clear that he didn't make the connection in his mind. Or maybe he did but Luffy was the kind of person to judge everyone by their own qualities, not to just lump on group of people together because they shared a common trait. Law gritted his teeth as he listened to Luffy talk about that time, the context of why Ace's death hit him so hard coming into sharp focus as he finished that part of the story with a few words.

"I cried all day and all night. They had to tie me to a tree, to keep me from running off. Ace came and found me the next morning, untied me. He promised me…" He falters for the first time, a look flitting across his face too quickly for them to decipher. Hurt? Disappointment? Betrayal? Resigned? Some sort of crushing feeling, naturally, before it turned into a soft, sad sort of smile. "He pr-promised me he wouldn't die." His voice falters for just a second, but the emotion in his voice is thick enough to leave a choking feeling in the air. The smile doesn't fade right away, either, as he looks down at the grass. "Guess it's impossible to keep every promise, huh?"

The tension was so thick, it could literally be cut with a knife, but Luffy simply shook his head and his usual smile was soon back in place. "Oh! But then, but then!"

And he was off again, talking about what it was like training with Ace afterwards. They didn't handle Sabo's death well, the crew could tell from the interactions after that. It was hard for them, at first, learning how to change from a three person fighting style to a two person fighting style. They clearly had enough practice, though, spending the next seven years together. Then Luffy was excitedly telling them about how Ace set sail to become a pirate. He grinned, laughing and light hearted again. "We agreed we'd set sail at 17, cause that's what Sabo wanted to do. In his honor or memory or something. It was pretty cool, watching Ace set out, and three years later, I went off myself. I sailed out of the same village where I met Shanks, beat up that stupid sea monster, and then got lost at sea! And almost died after that, when my boat was sucked into a whirlpool!" He laughs again, louder this time. "Luckily, I had an empty barrel of water so I climbed in that and floated along until someone picked me up. It was another pirate crew, which is how I met Coby, and together we sailed for a bit until we met Zoro and parted ways."

Now, Zoro could understand a whole lot better why Luffy couldn't stop crying in Dressrosa after meeting Sabo. It made so much sense. He had just literally, met the brother he thought was dead for a decade. As Luffy went back to stuffing his face, now gushing about how great the food was, the crew marveled out how well Luffy seemed to be handling the situation. Perhaps Luffy was a lot stronger mentally than they usually gave him credit for; sure he could be childish, impulsive, and prone to pouting or acting spoiled, but in a pinch, he was always ready to be what anyone needed of him.

Perhaps, they just didn't give enough credit to their captain, after all…


	11. Thousand Sunny (End)

It wasn't so easy, to let him go.

Vaguely, Nami wondered out loud if this is how the crew felt of the previous Pirate King, when Gold Roger had gotten sick.

Losing him felt like they were losing a huge piece of themselves, part of their core. Luffy had been so central in their lives for such a short time, in comparison to how long he'd lived. Maybe it was the Conquerer's Haki but somehow, that didn't seem like it was right. It was just _Luffy._ _He_ did this to them, his personality, his infectious laughter, his love of life and adventure. _He'd_ drawn them in naturally, as naturally as breathing, and the idea of losing him at all, especially like this, was more than any of them could bear.

It shouldn't have happened. It wasn't an attack, that got him in the end. Nor was it self-sacrifice, at least, not obviously. Not that they'd known, at the time. Lucci had known, had predicted this outcome but none of them had been there to hear his assessment and none of them knew how close to the truth it came. The former CP-9 agent, now CP-0, had warned that Luffy using his powers like Gear 2nd, would shorten his life. Luffy hadn't cared, though. To protect his friends, his nakama, he was willing to throw everything away. Nothing was taboo.

That was what had led to the illness, if you could call it that. His life was wasting away. He'd been the Pirate King for only a few short years but he'd done it. And having gained his goal, he became what he wished most in the world. He became the freest man of the sea. Nami remembered laughing, telling him that he had always been that, and he'd just laughed off her words. If only she could go back, to tell her younger self to hug him tight, hold him close. Her captain was dying and nothing could change that now. She choked on a sob that threatened to escape, shaking her head and desperately forcing a smile. An answering smile stretched across those thin, dry, cracked lips.

"Shi shi shi…"

* * *

Usopp gulped, tears falling freely down his cheeks. It was never supposed to be like this. Luffy was the strongest man he'd ever met. He didn't mean physically. It wasn't like they hadn't lost battles before and he was sure there were still stronger opponents out there than them. No, his captain had always been so strong mentally, emotionally. He'd been able to carry them, a band of misfits that couldn't have gotten along on any other pirate ship together, and get them to all their goals. He'd carried them through the entire Grand Line, to that beautiful finish line, pushing them forward to their greatest and when they stumbled, when they threatened to break, he acted as their beacon. For him, they'd be the best version of themselves. For _him_ , they would do anything, _be_ anything, he needed.

He reached out and picked up a hand, so thin, so fragile. Luffy had never seemed fragile before now. He was skinny. This scrawny kid who didn't seem to know what he was talking about when he first showed up in his village all those years ago. This kid who declared without a shadow of a doubt that he would be the pirate king, who had invited him on his ship. This kid who shook up the world again and again and _again_ , until no one knew what to expect from him. Luffy was the most unexpected person but even when other people looked down on him, Usopp would never think him weak again, not after he defended his village, not after having fought with him so many times. Luffy was the strongest person he knew.

So why? Why was he lying here, dying, this shell of the person he used to be?

He gulped and gripped the thin hand tighter, forcing a smile as well. "Hey captain. Heard you wanted to see us?"

* * *

Zoro couldn't watch. He stood guard at the door, back turned to the room. All he had to do was turn around, take two steps, and he could see his captain again. He couldn't do it, though. His core trembled with emotions he couldn't even begin to name. He wanted to deny this. This, **_death_** , wasn't an enemy he could fight. He would destroy any enemy against Luffy without hesitation, without thought, in an instant but this was one he couldn't defend against. His mind went a mile a minute, analyzing the past, trying to see something, some clue he missed. The stronger his captain got, the more confident they'd been as a crew, but that strength was what ultimately led them here. Wasn't there something he could have done to prevent this? It was too soon, too fast. They weren't ready to let him go yet.

They weren't ready to say goodbye.

 _He wasn't ready._

* * *

Sanji stood on the other side of the door, smoking a cigarette. He stared up at the falling snow, remembering a different day, another time when they had to say goodbye to a beloved nakama. Would Luffy be seeing Merry now? It should be silly; Merry Go was just a ship, but Merry was so much more to them. Merry had a soul, one they'd seen off, and that day was still ingrained in his head. The sea was such a fickle mistress. Any one of them could have died, at any moment, during their journeys. Instead, they'd had adventure after adventure. More than once, they'd almost died. From naivety, like Nami getting bitten on Little Garden, to going out on a limb for each other over and over again. Each and every time, it was the thought of Luffy that pulled them up. He was always right there, just a moment away from turning around and smiling, laughing at them. A second away from reaching out his hand to help.

This is the man who showed him what Zeff had meant for him when he gave him the food, let him survive and not starve to death. This is the man who had brought him to his dream, the All Blue. This is the man who let him experience the true wonder of being surrounded by mermaids. This is the man who had fought tooth and nail, went up against a Yonko, just to get him back. This is the man who wouldn't let him hide, wouldn't let him run away, who begged him to come back, who yelled he couldn't do this without him.

He didn't notice the tears that slipped down his cheeks as he wondered for the very first time, how he would continue living his adventures without Luffy.

* * *

Chopper sobbed, tried to suck it up, but couldn't help the emotions shaking him. With trembling hooves, he carefully unhooked and changed the IV bag. He had to be strong. He was Luffy's doctor. He had to make sure he was comfortable. Even if he couldn't…

Couldn't…

Couldn't _save him_ …

Can't…

It was like losing the Doctor all over again.

It was ten times worse.

No one could ever replace the Doctor. No one would ever replace the Doctorine or the knowledge she'd taught him.

But…

No one could replace Luffy either.

Why?

Why?

 ** _Why?_**

He was a doctor, wasn't he?! There had to be some sort of cure, something he missed, something he overlooked, that could solve this, fix this, _save him._

For Luffy, he didn't care if he threw the last of his humanity. He would gladly become a monster for Luffy, he'd told Zoro that, and he meant every word. He didn't regret a thing.

But who would he be without Luffy?

A great doctor but a doctor without his main purpose. He'd gained the ability to show the sakura blossoms to almost every patient but when he needed to most, when he wanted to save his beloved captain, there was nothing he could do.

This… he'd never felt more helpless.

"Chop…per…"

He quickly rubbed his nose and eyes clean of tears and snot, rushing to Luffy's side. He had to be by his side, give him everything he could. "Yes!"

A weak hand reached up, across his sickly thin body, to pat his head so softly. The motion was too much and he wheezed even from that much strain. Chopper put his hand down on his chest, opening his mouth to tell him to rest, but Luffy beat him to it.

"It's…okay… You did…good… Smile… Chop…per…"

Chopper hiccuped and felt Usopp ruffle his head with his free hand. The older man refused to let go of Luffy's hand. These could very well be his last minute and all of them wanted, needed, to witness them.

"You rest, Luffy. We'll… We'll… go on another adventure… when you get bet…better…" He forced a smile, trying to believe the words he was saying. Luffy was going to get better. He had to. He had to…

* * *

Robin stood back, watching the scene. She wanted to feel detached. She almost wished, in a moment of weakness, she could go back to those days when the crews she joined meant nothing to her. But no, she could never go back to that. She was grateful, truly grateful, for every moment she'd spent with her captain. Again and again, he'd saved her life, against her will even. He hadn't listened, not once, when she begged to die. He always pushed her to live, to keep moving forward, to pursue her goals, her dreams. There was always something better, greater, waiting just around the corner, if she'd just wait and look for it. His childlike glee as he called out for her to join each adventure never failed to bring her genuine amusement. From day one, when she asked to join his crew, he'd accepted her without question. He hadn't doubted even once. While several of his crew had pointed weapons at her, he'd had his guard down. When she demanded to join his crew, he just said okay, and reassured his worried nakama that she wasn't a bad person.

Luffy was the brightest light, one that had pushed out even the darkness that followed her. He'd banished that darkness to the farthest corners of the seas, even fought the world government for her. He'd declared war on the world to save her, just her, one nakama. He was an amazing, brilliant man, one with a heart of gold. The world would lose a little of it's brightness, it's shine, when he was gone. She took a quiet step forward, ready to say goodbye. For him, she would be strong enough to share this moment he wanted to have with his crew so badly.

* * *

Everyone assumed Franky would be bawling like a baby the minute there was even a hint, a mention, of Luffy possibly dying. They were so very wrong. The cyborg stood stoic, staring down at his captain with dry eyes. It wasn't that he wasn't broken up; he was. Being broken up about it, crying about it, wouldn't do anything for Luffy right now, though. There would be time for tears, for crying, after he was gone. Until then, he'd be ready; ready to fulfill any last requests that might come for him, for any of them. If he cried too loudly, something might be missed. He didn't want to wail and cover up any last words.

He felt more than saw Robin take a tentative step forward. She stood side by side with him, the two of them ready to say goodbye. All of them, really, had experienced death before. They knew what was coming, should be more than prepared to face this, but as she reached out and gripped his metal hand, he realized that none of them would ever be truly prepared for what was coming. There was no _getting ready_ for saying goodbye to one of the most important, one of the most central figures in your life. No one would ever touch so many people, so many lives, like Luffy had, and certainly not all of their lives. Never again. Tightly, but not too tight, he gripped her hand back and tried to focus on the next moments.

* * *

It had been sad, saying goodbye over and over and over again to his crew. It had been heart breaking, had drove him quite mad from time to time, really. Brook knew what it was like to lose an entire crew. It was the most devastating blow in his entire life. He didn't think he'd feel a second blow like that again so soon. Death was nothing to him and he'd see quite a bit of it before the end of the world claimed his second life. Still, Luffy was the man who reached out and brought him out of the dark. He took in a skeleton that would have and did scare others, even those in his own crew. To lose such a man, to break up such a wonderful crew…

Because he saw what would come next, even if no one could voice it yet. Without Luffy here to hold them all together, the crew would disband. And no one could take his place. They would never accept anyone when it came to taking orders, to leading and guiding them. Luffy was the only captain they would ever accept. He would lose his captain and crew all over again. It was sad but such was the way of life.

Hesitantly, Brook lifted his violin and began to play a farewell tune. The smile on his captain's face, the look of peace and the ease of his pain was enough. That was enough for Brook.

* * *

Outside, Law stood vigil with the rest of the leaders of the Strawhat Grand Fleet. He never thought this day would come. That rookie who'd fearlessly punched out a Celestial Dragon, who rushed into the war to save his brother, who had carelessly proclaimed he would defeat all the Yonko when he agreed to team up with him. The man who had stated calmly that he would be pirate king, who had beat him to the title, here he was, on his last legs. He looked at the generals, at Cavendish, Bartolomeo, Sai, Ideo. He stared at Hajrudin and Orlumbus, watched as Leo and a few other Tontas flew above them. All here to honor the man that they would pledge their lives to in an instant. Bartolomeo was a crying mess, while Cavendish was in blind denial. He claimed that clearly their doctor was a fraud and they should find another, even demanded that Law go check up on him, as if the pirate captain wouldn't have tried to heal him if he could. Sai was silent, respectful. His manner indicating that he was already accepting the fate laid out before Luffy now.

It wasn't just his Grand Fleet who'd come to see him off, either. His greatest allies were arriving one by one. Even if they couldn't see him in his last moments, they wanted to be here for him, with him, until the end. There was Ivankov's ship, showing up. Rayleigh, Mihawk, Hancock, even Shanks and Kaido showing up to share in this moment. Not to mention his family… Garp and Dragon were seated outside the room, by his two right hand men, while Sabo walked into the room to join the rest of the crew.

With a sigh, Law went to stand next to the only crew member not close to his captain right now. "Not going to go to him, Jimbei?"

The fishman turned to look at him, his expression guarded. "Against my advice, he reached out to all his friends, his nakama. He even reached out to the princess, Nefertiti Vivi. It's only a matter of time before the world government gets wind and comes after us. I won't let them ruin this moment, nor desecrate his body, as they intended to do with the Great Old Man."

Law nodded in understanding. No. He didn't think he could stomach the idea either, of saying goodbye to Luffy only for the world government to make a mockery of his death. His hand tightened around his sword instinctively at the thought. No, he definitely couldn't allow that either.

"I think I'll join you in keeping watching."

Jimbei gave him a long, knowing looking but didn't say anything.

* * *

Sabo took off his hat, looking down at the small body of his baby brother. He went first. It was always supposed to be him. First Ace and now he was going to lose Luffy, too. It wasn't fair. He didn't want to lose his only other brother. Not Luffy, not his baby brother. He gulped, tears springing so easily to his eyes. Only Luffy. Only Luffy could make him feel like this, could make him so close to the verge of tears, so easily.

Was saying goodbye always this so hard? Ace had been sudden and had given a taste of what Luffy and Ace must have gone through when they thought they lost him so long ago. Was he now getting a taste of what Luffy went through when he was trying to save Ace? The desperation, the hope that he had the cure in his hand, the fear that he was much too late? The desperate need to run, to do something, to spare him from this fate. This was pure torture. He didn't think he would be able to take it if Luffy really did die after everything he'd gone through to get that one mushroom, one he was sure, was positive, would save his baby brother's life. Just one more miracle. That's all he was asking for, hoping for. He just wanted Luffy to pull out one more miracle, one more impossible turn around.

Please.

 _Please._

Don't take him.

 _Don't take his baby brother._

* * *

"I…want to go… outside." Luffy breathed. "See…everybody…"

"You're not better yet, Luffy!" Chopper instantly protested. "We don't know if this cure Sabo brought you is working yet or not!"

Luffy, so incredibly thin he was practically the same size as Brook, not quite all skin and bones since he _was_ made of rubber but as close as _he_ could come to it, just laughed off the concern. "Shi shi shi… If it doesn't… work… it doesn't… If it's going to… it will. Worrying…"

He went into a coughing fit, unable to continue talking. It went on for one agonizing minute, then two, then three, before finally subsiding. He wiped his cracked lips, not noticing that one crack had opened wand was bleeding. It smeared a little but the captain and pirate king didn't care.

"I want to… go outside." He insisted stubbornly.

Chopper looked ready to argue but Sabo stepped forward, nodding. He knew his little brother. Luffy was stubborn. If they didn't give in, he would likely try to do so on his own and hurt himself. "I don't think your captain is going to listen to doctor's orders, Doctor Chopper. Maybe if we support him and carrying him out there."

Luffy smiled and laughed again. "Shi shi shi shi…"

Helped and supported by Sabo and Usopp, they brought Luffy outside. The moment he passed the doorway, Sanji and Zoro were flanking either side of them, ready to offer whatever support they needed for their captain, ready to defend him even here, among friends, and ready to catch him if the two should somehow drop him. Luffy rested what body weight not being supported by his best friend and his brother on the railing, looking down at all who answered the call. It was a start for many of them. They had known he wasn't doing well, obviously, but seeing it so plainly obvious was jarring. This was real. Reality. There was a very good chance they were losing him. This man who had saved nations, who had shaken up the world, declared war on the world government, who had taken them all by storm and turned up the lives of so many, he was dying.

As if today was just another day, he grinned down at all of them. His face creased up with delight, his eyes squeezing closed, even as he smiled.

"Shi shi shi… I wanted to… thank you… Thank you all… For all the fun… the adventures… Thank you… for supporting me… this whole time… and going along with… all my selfish…ness… I have never… once… forgotten any… of you… or how… important you are… to me…" He had to take a moment to catch his breath, to calm down as a small coughing fit took over. He grinned again once he caught his breath and got everything back under control. "Thank you… all… And thank you… Sunny… for carrying us… on such great adventures…"

He covered his mouth for a moment, to catch a few more traitorous coughs. "I don't… know… what tomorrow… brings. But… never stop… adventuring… Tomorrow's… another fun… day. And adventures… are best with… friends… with nakama… with all of you…"

He fell silent, eyes lowering to almost closed as the drain on him finally settled. While they were still processing all of this, a new voice spoke up.

 ** _"No, thank you, Captain. It was my greatest pleasure to go on all kinds of adventures on with you. Thank you, for loving me. Thank you, for pouring so much into me. Thank you for taking such good care of me. I've been so happy to sail for you."_**

Luffy's eyes slid closed and his head drooped against the railing. "Glad to hear it… Sunny…"

The voice they were hearing now, all around them, was the Thousand Sunny, the very ship they were standing on. Several pirates stopped and held still. Others turned around in wonder. Only the original crew, who knew, who had experienced this before with Merry Go, were not surprised. The Thousand Sunny told of how happy it had been adventuring with them, how much it loved them and especially loved Luffy. Usopp piped in, also excitedly telling his favorite adventures, tears streaming down his face. He talked of how exciting, how amazing, it was traveling with Luffy and how he couldn't wait to experience even more amazing things in the future. He didn't dare say his wish out loud, that he would do so with his captain, but everyone could hear it in the tone of his voice. One by one, the crew started talking, over one another, adding their voices. Thanking Luffy for all the help he'd given them, the guidance, the adventures, the fun times, the good times, for every time he saved them even from themselves. His friends pitched in, adding their own two bits. A sigh escaped Luffy's lips, his eyes still closed, in the midst of all this. The change in his body weight had Sabo's hands shaking as the tears finally began falling. His voice was soft but it seemed to cut through the voices, leaving them dying away.

"Luffy…?" He questioned again.

The young man didn't respond, his breathing too shallow in his chest.

"Luffy… I just want you to know." He choked out, the tears making it impossible for him to see his little brother even though he was in his arms. "You are loved. You are so loved, Luffy. So, if you can, hold on. Just for a little longer, hold on, for us. For all of us. And if you can't…"

He choked on the words. He had to get them out, though, he couldn't leave him hanging.

"We'll keep moving forward." Usopp continued for him, tears still trailing down his face. It shouldn't be possible to cry as much as he has but then again, everything seems impossible when it comes to Luffy. Crying an impossible amount of tears over him was only par the course. "If you can't stick around, that's okay. Cause, cause…"

"We'll keep pushing forward." Sanji pitched in. The cigarette he'd been smoking earlier long abandoned. "You taught us that."

"We won't fail you." Zoro picked up where he left off.

"We'll live each day happily." Nami promised.

"We won't question the impossible. We'll live happily, regardless of what the future brings." Robin vowed.

The tears that Franky had kept at bay for so long easily spilled over now. "We'll… We'll reach for new dreams and find new goals."

"We won't fear tomorrow." Brook added solemnly.

"We'll embrace the unknown and find new ways." Chopper sobs.

"And someone will pick up your will, will carry on where you left off." Jimbei promised.

"We all will." Law agreed.

Still breathing shallowly, deep in a healing sleep, Luffy teetered on the edge of life and death. He could go either way. And in his sleep, he smiled.

* * *

And with this, I end my little series. I won't be updating this any further. I am purposely leaving it open ended. He could live or die in these last moments. That's up to you. I believe that given each of the crew has lost someone important to them, usually in front of their eyes, they could handle Luffy's death. At the same time, he's shaped them so much in the few years he's been with them, that it would take a huge chunk of them to deal with the aftermath. None of them would really be ready to lose him, especially given these circumstances.

Also, it is canon that using his powers is eating away at his life. Lucci states as much and Luffy states that he doesn't care. Rayleigh says he's refined and gotten a better hold of his powers but it's never stated again if they are still taking such a damning toll on him.

Again, you can take the ending either way. Sabo somehow managed to find a miracle cure that worked at the last minute, or, like all those with the "will of D" he dies with a smile on his lips. I hope you enjoyed what I've done so far and look forward to bringing you more in the future. ^^


End file.
